Md. Abdus Sabur: Twelve Important Tips for a Happy Marriage Life

Twelve Important Tips for a Happy Marriage Life

By: Dr. Md. Abdus Sabur

we‡q†Z m~Lx nIqvi 1 WRb wUcm&t

Wv. †gvt Ave`ym meyi

Gg.Gmwm, wWGBPGgGm,

1) Enter the marriage with the right intention and renew this often

we‡qi welqwU Ggb GK RvqMvq †cŠ‡Q w`b †h GB m¤úK©wU Avcwb wdeQi bevqb Ki‡eb ev m¤úK©wU bZzb K‡i fve‡eb|

2) Remember that your spouse is also your brother or sister in Islam

memgqB g‡b ivL‡eb †h Avcbviv ¯^vgx-¯¿xiv Bmjvg ag©g‡Z ci¯ú‡ii fvB ev †evb

3) Do not hold unrealistic expectations

me mgqB Aev¯—e Avkv †Q‡o w`b; †h Avkv evZzjZv ev gixwPKv, Zvi †cQ‡b Qy‡U †KvbI jvf †bB|

4) Focus on the best in your spouse

¯^vgx-¯¿xi bRi †`qv DwPr †hw`KUv fvj ‡mw`KUvq

5) Be your mate’s best friend

Avcbviv ci¯ú‡ii eÜz †nvb| ¯^vgx hw` ïayB ¯^vgx nq ev ¯¿x hw` ïayB ¯¿x nq Zvn‡j wecwË eva‡eB|

6) Spend quality time together

‡h mgq¸‡jv Avcbv‡`i `yÕR‡bi Kv‡Q me‡P‡q `vgx (†KvqvwjwU UvBg cvwms) `yR‡bB †m me mgq GK‡Î fvM K‡i wbb| GKmv‡_B _vKzb|

7) Express feelings often

Avcbv‡`i Abyf~wZ ¸‡jvi cÖKvk NUvb

8) Admit to mistakes and ask for forgiveness

‡h fyj ci¯ú‡i K‡i‡Qb †m¸‡jv †g‡b wbb Avi ¶gv †P‡q wbb|

9) Never bring up past mistakes

¯^vgx ev ¯¿xi hw` †Kvb AZxZ NUbv †_‡K _v‡K †m¸‡jv †Kvb fv‡eB †U‡b Avb‡eb bv (craving to straighten out one’s affair)

10) Surprise each other at times

‡Kvb welq wb‡q ‡Kvb GK mgq G‡K Aci‡K Pg‡K w`b|

11) Cultivate a sense of humor

‡KŠZzK wcÖq †nvb ¯^vgx ¯¿x `yR‡bB| mgq KvU‡e fv‡jv|

Bmjv‡gi wcÖq bex nhiZ gynv¤§` (mt) Zvui wcÖq ¯¿xM‡Yi mv‡_ †KŠZzK Ki‡Zb| wZwb mvnex‡`i mv‡_I †KŠZzK Ki‡Zb|

12) Quick tips for discussions and disagreements

Av‡jvPbv I gZwe‡iv‡ai Aemvb NU‡bvi Rb¨ K‡qKwU wUcm&t

Begin with the intention to resolve the issue. Ggb AvMÖn cÖ_‡gB _vK‡Z n‡e †h Df‡qB gZwe‡iv‡ai Aemvb NUv‡eb
Remember that it takes two to quarrel. GKnv‡Z Zvwj ev‡Rbv,GK_vwU me mgqB †Lqvj Ki‡Z n‡e
Both spouses should not be angry at the same time.
¯^vgx-¯¿xi KvD‡KB GKB mg‡q ivMvwš^Z nIqv hv‡eB bv|
Never yell (shout, scream, and roar) at each other unless the house is on fire. memgqB G‡K Ac‡ii mv‡_ MRMR/KUv¶ Ki‡eb bv|
Never go to sleep with an argument unsettled.
‡Kvb SMov wb¯úwË bv K‡i weQvbvq hv‡eb bv|
If one spouse needs to win, let it be your mate. hw` ¯^vgx-¯¿xi †KD GKRb SMovq wR‡Z †h‡Z Pvb, wRZ‡Z w`b| KviY, Avcbviv `yR‡bB†Zv GKvš— |
Remember your house in Paradise! ‡e‡nk‡Z Avcbv‡`i Ni ˆZix _vK‡e GUv wPš—v Ki“b| Bmjv‡gi wcÖq bex nhiZ gynv¤§`(mt) e‡jb, †Kvb gvbyl hw` m‡Z¨i Ici †_‡KI SMov †_‡K weiZ _v‡K Ges wg_¨vi Kv‡QI hvq bv| Avjvn Zvi Rb¨ †e‡nk‡&Zi gvSLv‡b GKwU Ni ˆZix K‡i †`‡eb| Avi Avjvn ‡e‡nk‡Zi Dcwifv‡M GKwU Ni evbv‡eb hviv Zv‡`i PwiÎ cweÎ iv‡L| (Avey `vD` 41/4782)

Md. Abdus Sabur